There are hundreds, thousands maybe, of stereotypes surrounding anorexia. And some of them might be true. For some people.
Recovery... Everyone is always told “to choose recovery” but we are never told exactly how to achieve this or what this even really means.
Recovery is a long road. Sometimes there will be bumps and hills and the occasional spiral, but you learn to make yourself stronger each time you are set back.
Any recovery takes time. There’s no set pace or step-by-step guide and everyone will have a different experience going through recovery.
On the surface, I do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING – no full-time job, no university studies, no running, no dance classes, no responsibilities. I can lounge around all day, take nap after nap and am not expected to be ‘productive’.
It is incredibly difficult to say those three words within your own mind, let alone unleashing them aloud: I need help.
We live in a world where our society defines us. A world where we must look perfect and act perfect to fit in. But what is perfect? What is normal?
Eight years of suffering from an eating disorder. Almost eight years spent in utter denial over the fact anything was wrong. Even in the darkest times spent as an inpatient in hospital never once did I use the “a word” because that was something other people struggled with.
I suffered from an eating disorder from the age of 12 to 22 and throughout this time and in the years after, I experienced social isolation and loneliness in many forms.
The thing I would like to talk about is the support that I have received from my family and close friends. At times I have tried to hide everything from everyone, but I did a terrible job because the problem became clearly visible when my weight plummeted.
I have always thought of myself as a very logical, objective person. But looking at the person that anorexia has made me become, I couldn’t be any further from that.
An eating disorder is not about an extremely low Body Mass Index (BMI) or an emaciated figure, and even though this is how it ended up for me it makes me wonder, now I am on the road to recovery, if my road could have been different.