Supporting someone with an eating disorder and pregnancy

Pregnancy can be a difficult time for someone who has experienced an eating disorder. The physical changes, increased focus on food and their body, and emotional demands of pregnancy can heighten anxiety and disordered thoughts. As someone who cares about them, your support can make a difference—but knowing how to help in a sensitive and effective way is not always straightforward.

Your support is invaluable in helping your loved one to feel less alone: Our tips below offer practical ways to support a loved one during pregnancy:

• Understanding where your loved one is in their eating disorder. You may find it helpful to look at our ‘Understanding the recovery journey: stages of change’ page.
• If you are worried that they may be at risk of relapse, encourage them to speak to their GP and offer to attend any appointments with them.
• Recognise how distressing pregnancy can be when combined with an eating disorder. Body changes, food expectations, and the pressure of growing a baby can intensify existing struggles. Acknowledge how overwhelming this time might feel for your loved one.
• Learn about eating disorders in pregnancy and how best to offer support. Understanding both the physical and emotional aspects can help you be there for them.
• Ask how they’re really feeling—both emotionally and physically—without making assumptions. Be supportive.
• If they say that they are fine and you’re still concerned about them, don’t wait too long before approaching them again. It might feel even harder than the first conversation, especially if they didn’t react well, but if you’re still worried, keeping quiet about it won’t help. Remember, eating disorders thrive on secrecy.
• Avoid talking about weight, body shape, dieting, or "eating for two." Don’t make unhelpful comments about their size, shape or what they’re eating.
• Remind yourself and your loved one that recovery is possible—even during pregnancy. Remind them that pregnancy can be a turning point for them and the eating disorder. Reassure them that with support, things can get better.
• Ask them what support would be most helpful. This could include things like helping them stick to regular eating, establishing routines after meals, or creating space for open, non-judgmental conversations. If they say you can’t help or ask to be left alone, acknowledge this and remind them you’re there if/when they need support.
• Reflect on any enabling behaviours you might be engaging in. These are things done to ease their distress—like avoiding conflict, cleaning up after disordered behaviours, or making separate meals—that unintentionally support the disorder. Over time, these actions can reinforce rather than challenge the illness.

The postpartum period can be physically and emotionally intense, and for someone with a past experience of an eating disorder, it can be a time when old patterns resurface. People assume that a healthy baby means the parent is okay too, but that’s not always the case. And we know that eating disorders can be secretive, so your loved one may try to hide signs that they’re struggling.

If you’re supporting a loved one and are worried about them, you can help them by:

• Checking in with them about their mental health — not just in the early days, but over the weeks and months that follow. Ask open-ended questions like, “How are you feeling in your body today?” or “Is there anything I can do to help?”
• Keeping an eye out on signs of relapse. These signs might include skipping meals, exercising excessively, frequent body-checking, or feeling guilty about food. Postpartum depression and anxiety can sometimes overlap with or mask disordered eating behaviours.
• Avoiding making comments about weight loss or appearance, even if they seem positive. Instead, celebrate what their body has done rather than how it looks. Redirect the focus toward being well for themselves and the baby, rather than size or shape.

If you sense something’s off, encourage them to speak with their midwife/GP/Health Visitor to get the support they need to be well.

There are more tips on our ‘Worried about a friend or a family member’ page.